Grace
“You’re SO MEAN!! You’re the worst mom ever!!” 😠 After sending Austyn to a time out for doing the exact opposite of what I’d asked, she’d screamed these words across the room. Then she apologized at bedtime. Crying into my shirt, she said, “Mom, you’re not mean. You’re my favorite mom and I love you so much. I just don’t get know you have to put me in time outs?!” She was sincere in her apology and her question. “I know you didn’t mean it, Austyn... but it’s part of my job. I don’t discipline you because I like to do it. I do it because I love you and I want what’s best for you. I want you to grow up and understand that what you do has consequences.” If I let my kid run around and do whatever she wanted, it would be dangerous, possibly life threatening. If I never said no, she’d eat her body weight in candy and play in the middle of busy streets. The craziest part of all of this, though. I never blame Austyn for throwing a tantrum because I order she turn Doc McStuffins off after hour 2. I’ll punish her for inappropriate behavior, a direct consequence of her choices, but I’ll never blame her. Not as a child. Because she doesn’t get it. How could I expect her to understand if I never teach her? It takes a couple go’s around the sun to learn this stuff. And honestly, I think it takes becoming a parent to understand what our parents sacrificed for us and just how deep our love runs. One time I told God He was the worst God ever. I told Him I hated Him. I didn’t trust Him. And that I was pretty sure He didn’t love me. I’m lucky He loves like a parent loves. Because I know He understands that I just didn’t get it yet. That forgiveness allows me to live FREE, unencumbered. Just like my little girl playing on the beach. I’m not thinking about all the ways I misjudged the One who loves me the most yesterday... I’m soaking up His love and marveling at it, as my heart swells at the blessings that came with His mercy and forgiveness. No matter where you come from, no matter what you felt or what you said, no matter how much growing you have left to do... He understands. His. Grace. Covers. You. 💕 #MadeforBrave
